A self-care routine for Dad

Father’s Day usually comes with socks, mugs, and maybe a dodgy BBQ set. But this year, we’re flipping the script. What if the best gift Dad could give his family was… looking after himself? Studies show dads who put their wellbeing first are more balanced, happier in their relationships, and nearly 80% say it makes home life smoother. In other words, self-care might just be the ultimate dad hack.

We sat down with three dads, Damian Durnford, Jeff Toomaga-Allen, and Darren Lane, to talk about the ripple effect of their wellbeing routines. From the small daily choices to the bigger mindset shifts, their stories show how a healthier dad means a happier household.

Damian Durnford is a dad to four girls, which means he carries both a lot of love and, at times, a lot of worry. He admits he often feels anxious about the world his daughters are stepping into, and that pressure can feel heavy. Over time, Damian’s realised that taking care of his own wellbeing is essential to what helps him slow down, stay patient, and be present with his kids.

For him, wellbeing looks like making space to manage those anxious thoughts so he can show up the way he wants to, as a calm, intentional dad. It’s in those moments that he’s able to guide his girls, not just protect them, teaching them how to be resilient and confident in a world that doesn’t always make it easy.

Jeff Toomaga-Allen might be known as a professional rugby player, but for him, the titles that matter most are husband and dad. Life on the field comes with pressure and physical demands, but Jeff’s biggest lessons aren’t about sport, they’re about family.

That’s where his own wellbeing comes in. By taking the time to look after himself, mentally, emotionally, and physically, Jeff has found he can show up in a stronger way at home first. It makes him more present with his wife, more intentional with his boys, and from there, he’s able to give his best to rugby as well. For Jeff, wellbeing isn’t separate from who he is as a dad or athlete, it’s the foundation that holds it all together.

Darren Lane remembers one moment like it was yesterday, crossing the street with his daughter Jessie and realising, I’ve never felt so responsible in my whole life. From that point on, fatherhood became the lens through which he saw everything.

For Darren, wellbeing isn’t about routines for himself alone, it’s about creating space to be the kind of dad Jessie needs. Time in nature, heading out on adventures, and keeping active all help him stay centred. He says it’s those practices that give him what Jessie has always described as a “calm strength” in her life.

That balance matters, because Jessie has never been one to shy away from the hard stuff. Even as a little girl, she had a fire for fighting injustice and a boldness about standing up for what she believed in. Watching her grow into that spirit, Darren often reminds himself to take a leaf out of her book, to be a little more like Jessie.

These three dads, Damian, Jeff, and Darren, remind us that looking after your wellbeing isn’t just about you. It shapes the way you show up for your kids, your partner, and the people who matter most. Fatherhood is a big responsibility, but as each of their stories show, when dads make space to rest, recharge, and reset, the ripple effect reaches the whole family.

So this Father’s Day, instead of another pair of socks or a novelty mug, give Dad something that actually invests back into him. A City Cave gift card is more than just a float, sauna, or massage, it’s a chance for him to press pause, care for his health, and come home stronger for the people he loves. Because when Dad feels good, everyone feels it.